The occasion sure causes a lot of unnecessary expenditure and uninhibited wastage of things for which you would have no control(when i say this i stick to a typical, traditional, family & friends type wedding) , but there really couldn't be a better occasion to meet new people and connect with the old ones.
Meeting long and literally lost relatives. School friends whom you see unbelievably changed. A congregation where you are immersed in a sea of known unknown people, when you just don't go into reality of the relationship and nod and smile to every human around. A lot of whom you sure wouldn't meet for a good ten years to come and the instant thing to reconnect would be "Aah! i met you at her wedding." Its an event that etches different memories for each one of them there and it sure is a family affair!
Now what do i say is the best part of it?
The beautiful 'Uunjal' songs that we get to hear mostly only then? The fact that you experience meanings to words that you just heard and read till now? The one time that you get to look beautiful whatsoever? That everything on that day boils down to the one moment you wait for, no matter how much you knew its coming and however long the boy and girl knew each other? Or the reality that however planned you are or you decide to be, you are sure to mess up things on that day and it doesn't even dawn on you at the moment!A moment long after the when you hit yourselves saying you are relatives now?
Or just that one emotion that brings in both laughter and tears, when things just stall and resume, when you are uncontrollably happy and giggling while the nadaswaram takes over with that mellifluous tune i love!
The Pros definitely did take over the Cons. Or may be there is a way to work around both. To keep all the good things there and still make a wedding that is so worth it, where people care about what they are doing, where they are spending and say a big NO to wastage of any sort.
There sure is a scope for something like that. When we find a balance where we dont contribute to flamboyance and still live the tradition that is beautiful and is so worth preserving!
7 comments:
looks like a follow-up on an earlier post! i was witness to the simplest and most fondly remembered wedding ceremony recently.
its not about the lavishness or the scale, but only of the freshness with which it lingers in your mind!
The moment I read your first paragraph, I started thinking that marriage is the great place to meet all your extended family, especially considering that I stay so far off, from rest of my clan. (And you mentioned that later.. :) )
Just one another thing I want to add, dont know if you are aware or not, but if you have left over food during marriage/functions , do call childline 1098, and they happily come and collect the food and distribute that to some school/orphanage.
@murali,
its a follow-up with a little perspective change.
i kno,simple wedding are the best! but you see very few ones around.
Goli,
even i hav heard about 1098 - foodhelpline. I was once in a gathering with representatives from a few NGO's and lots of volunteers. One volunteer mentioned about the leftover food and the helpline no for which a lady who runs a home with few kids snubbed back saying, we arent beggers and we dont want leftovers. i give my kids good food and expect the same when you want to donate food. I thought it did make sense.
Nice post. Oonjal is the best. The so called 'Light music' is the worst.
Good post.. you may want to read through the details of our marriage
http://pulzinponderland.wordpress.com/a-glimpse-into-my-marriage-rich-in-photos/
We went for Arya Samaj marriage due to all the reasons you have mentioned in the post. Apart from that we also tried divert marriage money for community development.
Reached this blog via Goli's. Couldn't agree more with the thought you express here. There must be fun during weddings; but never extravagance. Some of the money that is lavished, can easily be reserved for the couple's life together.
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